Gaming
Animal Crossing players are using in-game fireworks for dick doodles
Give a person a firework, and they'll blow it up in a day. Teach a person to make fireworks and... they'll draw schlongs with them all summer long.
Animal Crossing: New Horizons has been rolling out new, predictably adorable seasonal content all summer, but its newest, innocent add-on appears to have already been corrupted by gutter-minded gamers in record time. Earlier in the month, game developers introduced fireworks, which players can set to go off every Sunday evening and can customize to their hearts’ content. And, wouldn’t you just know it, a lot of people have started drawing exploding schlongs, combusting cocks, and popping peckers.
The Dong Days of Summer — Of course, the appearance of gigantic, flaming penises in the pixelated night sky isn’t exactly surprising — it’s not like the gaming community is the most PG-rated of places. The colorful light displays aren’t limited to crudely-drawn dicks, though. Some of them are sufficiently detailed to speculate about the artist's religious affiliations. Others, meanwhile, are joyfully ejaculating.
It's hilarious considering Nintendo's famously prudish approach to videogames, and the mechanics of the game mean onlookers are spellbound and enthusiastic no matter what the fireworks look like.
Skywriting — While some fireworks artists have confined themselves to human anatomy, others have opted to communicate with words, as the screenshots below demonstrate.
No end to its popularity in sight — Since its release in March, Animal Crossing: New Horizons has quickly become one of Nintendo’s bestselling games of all time, including being embraced by celebrity nerd royalty and even politicians.
It’s doubtful that the inclusion of firework boobs and penises will do much to affect those sales numbers, but hey, stranger things have happened on Tom Nook’s island domain in the recent past. Those of you finally convinced to get in on the action after seeing such wondrous astral images can start up just in time for more updates reportedly on the way next month.
And who knows what kind of lewd mischief we’ll get into in the near future? Until then, there’s no word whether putting on a pornographic sky display will disqualify you from the $1,000 prize one company is offering a lucky ACNH player, though. We suspect, though, that if it's good enough for Nintendo, it's good enough for them, too.